One life i lived... and mistakes i have done

It’s a small story… I am even ashamed that I am revealing this one… I often visit rural area’s of bihar as it is part of my business… I use to meet people, Sarpanch, Pax Members, BDO, SDO, DM, Police Officers, Teachers, Professors, and other many people. But after all meetings when I am free I like to be alone so I can collect all data and strategies… five or six months back (February or March 2012) I went to Aurangabad District (Bihar)… My grandfather Late Batukeshwar Singh was one of popular freedom fighter and he established entire village “SATTAR” in Aurangabad District. So in the end of my tour I decided to stay my last night of trip in my own village. After two days of straight driving and visiting places meeting many people… lot’s of arguments and discussions I finally reached to “SATTAR” on third day of my tour… one thing was quite obvious that after all gather up and discussions I use to sit alone for few hours after that I use to call coordinator of that place that I am ready to meet if I have not able to meet anyone I suppose to meet or whatever plan you have for me, I am ready to participate… but before that no one can disturb me…it’s psychological illness but I would say in my defense that there are so much problems and information’s… I have to keep every information in order to make things better…in  SATTAR the person who was arranging all programmes was one of my long distance relationship person named “BAJRANGI”… wherever I use to go… people and children’s use to come and see me like I am an alien… even when I am tiered and trying to take a nap or working upon data’s I have… they stair me like I am someone they never seen on earth… now here story starts… when I went to Aurangabad I met few people at the place called “TENDUA and NABINAGAR”… after that I went to SATTAR… I decided to stay at my grandfather’s house… but people were coming and going like a bus stop and few children’s were use to come and see me… they smile, giggle and they stair… that’s it… it was like I am on display on e-bay… I was sitting in my grandfathers room and actually I was feeling like I am getting inspiration from my grandfather but in between I saw that around 8-10 children were watching me from window’s and side doors… I called Bajrangi in very angry mode… because 1^st I was really tiered and 2^nd I was not comfortable with this 24X7 display item situation… he came within few seconds… I ask him to get rid of everyone as soon as possible because I have to take a nap before I leave for Patna (Capital of Bihar)… he did all what I asked him… but after few minutes when I was trying to sleep I peak little bit and saw a CHILD close to main gate standing… I really get mad and shouted my programme manager “BHUSHAN BHAIYA”…  also as I remember I called every possible name I knew who were presented at that time in that house… suddenly most of them appeared… few didn’t appeared …. I hope because they don’t want to see me in angry mode or they were not around… I asked that girl “beta, tum ghar kyun nahin jaa rahi ho?? Chalo… abhi ka abhi ghar jao… chacha (Myself) ko aaraam karna hai…” then I turn to my people and scold over them… didn’t you knew that i requested all that please leave me for few hours… how come she is still here… one job I ask you all and you all are this much careless and irresponsible… I was on top of my anger…. But suddenly someone said “everyone is outside… they all will meet you at 4 AM.”… then I said “how come she is around when I am trying to take few minutes of rest? i have expensive things,(also my Pistol and Mobile)… then someone said… “ye to Bajrangi ki Beti hai…” I asked him… what is she’s doing here… everyone knows that I am taking two hours rest… then nuclear bomb exploded… SHE IS BLIND BHAIYA… NO ONE TOOK HER TO HER HOME AND SHE CAME HERE TO HEAR YOU ONCE… I was not only speechless… it was like I felt again that I cant cry… six to eight years child… so much life ahead… but she cant see someone… and I am the person she wanted to hear once and I am living in attitude… I was as shut with shame and guilt that I didn’t said a word…I took that child in my hands… I went to bajrangi’s house… I scolded over Bajrangi that you know we have NGO (SUVI SEWA)… take this child to Patna Medical College Hospital (PMCH) and I will arrange all things… all cost is on me…. He promised me that he is coming next week… but after 2-3 months he didn’t appeared… I could call him but I knew I cant involve in personal life of any family… this is weird thing in society… he or his family don’t care about his own child. Finally I felt that they can come to get treatment if they will see some additional profit in this situation… so I talked to health minister of bihar, Uncle Giriraj… he helped me beyond I could ask… now Monday is a day my NGO “SUVI SEWA” is going to help 50 childs to get treated… now I just want to sit next to that same girl and when she can see this world I want to say that “I am sorry beta, I was rude and sarcastic when I met you first… I wish you can forgive me and give me another chance.” Please pray for Monday event…. Not even I want this event to be successful, it’s like one of the things I will do and sleep peacefully.